Are you 'hesidating'? Here's what's going on with the latest dating trend

While some singles are fast-forwarding, others are 'hesidating' thanks to the world's uncertainty

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Matters of the heart are complicated, and "hesidating" makes things even trickier. 

Our romantic lives are looking a lot different in the wake of the pandemic. While some people are experiencing dating burnout, others are so busy fast-forwarding that they're jumping into serious commitments almost instantaneously. 

Then you have singles who aren't quite sure what to make of the dating scene. Plenty of Fish coined the term "hesidating" as a feeling of indifference, not knowing whether you'd like to date casually or seriously during such an uncertain time. 

"I feel like singles are running the gamut," says Jaime Bronstein, relationship therapist, coach and host of “Love Talk Live” on LA Talk Radio. "Some are so eager to get out there again—they've had enough FaceTime. [Others] are mirroring what's going on with COVID because there's this uncertainty."

What is 'hesidating'?

According to the love pros over at Plenty of Fish, 70% of daters claim that the indecisiveness that comes with hesidating is very real—and a problem. 

"A lot of people are like, 'Is it even worth it to start something?'," Bronstein adds. "I've had a lot of clients express how they're fearful." 

Whether it's fear of serious health complications or city restrictions placing normal dating activities on hold, hesidating seems to encompass all of those emotions. 

What's the bottom line?

The past two years have been trying, to say the least, and the effects of the pandemic have changed things that once seemed so normal—like going out to dinner with a Hinge match and sharing a kiss before parting ways. 

Although there's no crystal ball to determine when things will return to "normal"—or if they ever will—Bronstein insists that we should use the changing landscape as an opportunity for growth.

Now is the time to figure out what works well for you and what does not. Proceed with caution for your health as well as your partner's, but don't let difficulties discourage you. What is meant to be will be!

Danielle Valente
Digital News Writer

Need a TV show recommendation? Maybe a few decor tips? Danielle, a digital news writer at Future, has you covered. Her work appears throughout the company’s lifestyle brands, including My Imperfect Life, Real Homes, and woman&home. Mainly, her time is spent at My Imperfect Life, where she’s attuned to the latest entertainment trends and dating advice for Gen Z.

Before her time at Future, Danielle was the editor of Time Out New York Kids, where she got to experience the best of the city from the point of view of its littlest residents. Before that, she was a news editor at Elite Daily. Her work has also appeared in Domino, Chowhound, and amNewYork, to name a few. 

When Danielle’s not writing, you can find her testing out a new recipe, reading a book (suggestions always welcome), or rearranging the furniture in her apartment…again.