Can masturbation kill your sex drive, or is that just a myth? Our sexperts weigh in

Wonder no more, folks! We're unpacking that 'Can masturbation kill your sex drive?' worry once and for all

Woman in bed alone
(Image credit: Getty)

We're all for independence, in the bedroom and otherwise, but can masturbation kill your sex drive?

Now that we're about to enter the friskiest time of year, women's libidos are heating up just like the temperature. But should we be opting for partnered activities like the Amazon sex position, or is it okay to be a lil' lazy and stick with hands-free vibrators and sex toys? Is there a target that we're supposed to be hitting?

There are plenty of sex myths and orgasm myths floating around, so we're turning to an expert to make the call. 

Can masturbation kill your sex drive? Sexperts say...

Rest easy, readers: masturbation does not kill your sex drive, nor does it make things trickier when teaming up with a partner, according to the pros. 

In fact, you can actually consider solo sex a helpful tool before bringing someone you love into the equation. In addition to providing women with their most intense orgasms, masturbation helps uncover what works well and what could be done differently—useful material before another body joins in.   

"Alongside a wide range of physical and mental benefits, regular female masturbation can actually help your sex drive," LELO Brand Ambassador Cameron Long-Tel tells us. "When regularly bringing yourself to orgasm, relieving stress and tension with a feel-good dopamine hit actually makes it easier to climax with a partner."

See? Not a hindrance at all. Plus, it's also important to remember that there are no rules when it comes to self-pleasure unless it gets in the way of your daily activities.

"Remind yourself that masturbating is healthy," sex blogger and influencer Julieta Chiara previously told My Imperfect Life. "If you do it often or once in a blue moon, there is no 'standard' to masturbation, and enjoying a healthy relationship with yourself is the most important aspect."

If you one day feel like experimenting with the best sex toys rather than opting for a frisky evening with the person you love, it's okay. We feel things at different times, and we can lean into whatever works well for us at the moment. 

"Every body is different, and a person’s sex drive will rise and fall continuously throughout our weeks and months depending on important factors like sleep, nutrition, exercise, work, and relationships," Long-Tel adds. 

Cameron Long-Tel

Cameron Long-Tel is a sexologist and brand ambassador for LELO, a brand of "luxury, aspirational sex toys for men and women who are proud of their sexuality."

That being said, she does make the case for solo sex and learning how to masturbate in a way that works well for you, particularly with help from toys. 

"There are multiple physical and mental health benefits of using [a sex toy]," she says. "It not only releases sexual tension, but it can reduce stress, improve sleep and self-esteem and it can also relieve menstrual cramps and muscle tension."

Need a bit more convincing? Sexperts just answered the most Googled questions about masturbation, and nothing was left out, so there's no need to turn to a search engine for answers—they've got you covered.

Danielle Valente
Digital News Writer

Need a TV show recommendation? Maybe a few decor tips? Danielle, a digital news writer at Future, has you covered. Her work appears throughout the company’s lifestyle brands, including My Imperfect Life, Real Homes, and woman&home. Mainly, her time is spent at My Imperfect Life, where she’s attuned to the latest entertainment trends and dating advice for Gen Z.


Before her time at Future, Danielle was the editor of Time Out New York Kids, where she got to experience the best of the city from the point of view of its littlest residents. Before that, she was a news editor at Elite Daily. Her work has also appeared in Domino, Chowhound, and amNewYork, to name a few. 


When Danielle’s not writing, you can find her testing out a new recipe, reading a book (suggestions always welcome), or rearranging the furniture in her apartment…again.